I'm still alive I promise!

i just went on a drunk rant in my livejouranl. faulkner comes to mind.

and then i accidentally deleted it all. oh well.

long story short:

i miss some of you. you might know who you are, you probably don't. we used to be super good friends, and now well, we are still friends, but i miss talking to you. or something.

blame the gin for this.

oh you, you taste like the prohibition.

Jade....wears booties.

This is one of them complicated announcements that I put off for long enough, yknow?

First, I was going to announce that I was going to start a comic, for real this time. I mean I have a tablet, it was going to be all good and stuff like that. I have characters, plot lines, everything but a website and that would have come in time...

But er...now I'm announcing that not only is there going to be a comic, but it is currently on hold.

How ever, the reason it is on hold is not because of lack of means in which to draw it, or anything like that...


But because I need to focus entirely on my portfolio. For illustration. Why is this considering the fact that I have never considered a career in illustration before?


Because I have an interview with an art director for a publishing company sometime in mid-september and may possibly get illustration work for yound adult novels.


But Cat! You have never had any actual talent in drawing before- now you want to go professional!?

Er...apparently yes. Very long story. This isn't really what I ever thought I'd be...but hell, Orson Welles wanted to be a painter.


-This isn't friendslocked, because fuck, this is exciting news, and I want to share this shit with the world.

So for the past few days I've been working for my mom an envelope stuffer for tax season. I've just sent tax forms to everyone in Highland Park, it's pretty good minimum wage under the table (read: TAX FREE) work, and it's very zen doing the exact same thing over and over for hours on end. But alas, I have finished taxing the entire town of Highland Park, and now I'm sitting at some Mick Jagger fan's desk (seriously, she has a bobble head) waiting for my mom's lunch break so we can go to a farmer's market, and then I head to my job interview in an hour.

Now, Elyse raised an amazing point here...if I just sent out tax forms, I was essentially taxing people, and does that mean that I am a peon of the government, and, in turn does that make me "the Man", and if this were the case, if I were the type of person who wanted to "stick it" to said Man, would I have to stick it to myself? My GOD.

I look rather cute today, I like scarves with stripes on 'em. The type that don't actually keep you warm if it were cold out.

Oh, as for a random update: two weeks in counting. no migraines. I'm pretty sure my blood is 95% Topamax right now.


Oh! Before I forget! Welcome to my friends section: jibjib_00. I promise you will most likely find it full of boringness and mediocre drawings.The last person who friended me got a picture of Tim Robbins, then again I don't think I drew him.


Apparently later on tonight I get to go bed shopping, which is "for the win". Phil still knows how to get a girl's toes curling by promising her actual sleeping room (that and a say in the purchasing process). A tiny one person bed that may or may not actually be for a ten year old is no place for a 20 and a 28 year old to sleep, dammit. Oh I hope he lets me pick out sheets!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1wnOUH2jk8

That video is delightfully weird and slightly disturbing in a way that's not...really. Watch it.

Disclaimer: the song is in no way a reflection of how I feel about Phil at this time, lord knows some people will take it that way. It's a catchy song...sort of. But I'll always think of people in masks on bicycles jumping randomly now.

I'm very happy with Phil, I just don't feel the need to broadcast to the world about it, I feel like it's sort of tacky if that's all you're about. I've been that person, I've seen those people (i.e. the ex boyfriend's girlfriend), and unless they have a good reason ,I don't really like those people who are like "JUNE 22, 2007- OMG TODAY IS TUESDAY AND ISN'T MY BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND GREAT?" I let it slide if the relationship is new because that's when it's all like "whee! yay new boyfriend/girlfriend he's/she's fantastic!" I like reading those because it's new, and happy! I had my "omg gushing over Phil" phase two months after we started dating because that when I acknowledged when we started dating...but that's a whole other messy story. Basically, it gets annoying when two years after you guys start dating, you're still acting like you started dating yesterday.

And it's also annoying when you steal my friends.

Goodness me, where did that come from? Ok, so I have a grudge towards a few people that has formed this particular bias. But who could blame me?

Oh, by the way, Elyse, Gina looked at my iTunes and said "oh, so are you emo now?" and I blame you.

Ooooh, in a few hours I get to drive back up to Montclair, YES. I've been promised a trip to see Stardust and an Uldaman run that will probably end me up as level 42! Bitchin! I do like these weekend Phil-seeing trips.

(for the record that is not gushing, I am merely stating that I like going back up to see Phil, if I were like THE SUN RISES AND SETS ON PHIL'S MIRACULOUS WHIM FOR HE IS GOD" then it would be what I'm talking about. ...And I should be shot.)

Harry Potter.


Damn.


Two things: First of all, Phil is getting a medal or something because he's doing all this stuff (including going to my Goddaughter's birthday party and agreeing to see Kevin Smith in August.) And to make it all mindblowing: to see this movie was his idea. And He let me rant about how it deviated from the book!

Ok, Luna Lovegood? I don't care if you're a Harry Potter Supah-fan, it doesn't mean that you're good at acting. They watered down the part so hard so that this chick could play it, I wanted to throw shit at the screen.

It was a series of images strung together so that people who have read the books could understand it, but the people I saw it with were like "eh? I do not understand who this Arabella Figg person is."

Other then that...I'm crushing on Bellatrix LeStrange so hard. Helena Bonham Carter rocked it.

ARFM-210-01 FILM MAKING, BEG II A- 3.00 3.00 3.00 11.10
ARFV-220-01 VIDEO/COMPUTER MULTMED, INTRO A B+ 3.00 3.00 3.00 9.90
WD 3.00 0.00 0.00 0.00
ARGS-260-04 VISUAL ARTS WORKSHOP A- 3.00 3.00 3.00 11.10
ANTH-210-03 URBAN ANTHROPOLOGY A- 3.00 3.00 3.00 11.10

I am one big ball of sick right now.


And not like "Patrick Bateman sick" but "I have a cold I don't want to do anything oh my god waaah snuggle with a blanket"

Finals. End.

Omigod...I am the geek.

SAY WHAT?


Yes. I have renamed my livejournal.

Yay!

OK, so lately things around here have been mostly "pokémania!" and I could not help but be sucked in. So, even though my journal has been friends only for a while...I just wanted to remind you all!




You have to wonder...is Corphish delicious with butter?

I'm beginning to wonder if people are capable of ending one relationship and beginning another without total and complete animosity. At this point in my life, I'm lucky to be okay with most ex-boyfriends and ex-lovers, I mean sure, Jake has still made it his personal mission to convince himself that I'm stalking him when I hang out with my friends at a party that he is also attending, or when I go into the Stop in Shop he works in (and the only one in town), he has decided I go in there to glare daggers at him because I obviously don't understand the love he has for Mary. Whatever.

Now, I see a certain someone going that route with a certain someone else I know, and it turns my stomach because I know how hurtful it can be. It reminds me of how Jake and Mary used to be, and while I don't see that "certain someone's" new girlfriend show animosity, I really don't know. It frustrates me because I couldn't and still can't defend myself from Jake and Mary's mission to destroy my life back home (which has largely succeeded, by the way), I want to defend my friend from someone's apparentlymission to destroy her life here.

I've been in this exact situation before, so I'm just going to say it, maybe a little harshly but at this point I think that it's necessary:

1. Ending a relationship does not mean ending a friendship.
2. Let me repeat myself just in case you skippped the first one: Just because romantic feelings are gone doesn't mean that friendly feelings have to go too, amazingly enough people can be friends after they break up.
3. In a crowd, just because the ex looks in your general direction, it doesn't mean that they even see you, sorry if they didn't notice the shining beacon of love you have for your new girlfriend.
4. Even if they do see you, that doesn't mean that they are glaring daggers at you. They might have just spotted you in the crowd. Amazingly enough, this person doesn't waste her time obsessing over you and your new girl, so she might have even been a little curious as to why you were completely across campus from where you commonly are.
5. After breaking up with someone, you don't have to automatically demonize them once you get a new girl. AMAZINGLY ENOUGH. That person is a person too, and AMAZINGLY ENOUGH, they might just have feelings, and they might not think about it anymore. I'm sorry if that ruins your fairy tale that you're spinning in your brain with that "certain someone" as the evil stepmother so you and your new girl could run off and be safe from her, but sometimes relationships don't start off in such a romantic light.

I suppose a lot of this frustration is because I've been in this "certain someone's" shoes before in the past, I still am, and it hurts every day I'm even in my hometown. I can't just stand by and watch a good friend of mine be demonized is all.

So get over it. It's over, stop focusing on what ended and focus on what's begun. It'll be good for you, I promise.

I'm done.

I have Urban Anthropology in a half an hour. I feel so...college.

So I've been having pretty fucked up nightmares these days, those stupid ones that make me wake up feeling really weird and off for the entire day. Of course, last night was no exception, it just so happens to be one of the few dreams I still remember fully upon waking up.

So, of course I'm going to write it down here, maybe you can tell me what it means, because I sure as hell don't know.

In retrospect it isn't scary more as it's stupid.

( Cut because I CAN. )
...So I don't know if the cast of Alpha Dog killed Brian or not, because Phil texted me this morning to tell me he got two copies of The Burning Crusade, and it woke me up.

Class time!

And so this is 2007. Hot damn.

I'm trying to think of everything that happened, and I have to say "holy damn". Over the course of 2006 I've made so many friends, lovers (okay...not so many that implies that I've slept around), and enemies, my head spins to really try to think about it all. Good things and awful things have happened, and well...that's life.

Now, people here have written down their resolutions, and I have to say that most of the resolutions I made I actually can't write down in this journal without making the entry private...seeing as the resolutions I've made are...rahter inappropriate to tell everyone.

However, I tell my main ones:

I resolve to let go of grudges and to forgive those who have hurt me.

Oh, and love without overanalyzing it.

And I wanna make more movies. Hello people, I own a sweet ass digicam and I burn to use it with my sweet ass tripod. I need a reason to stop playing Animal Crossing: Wild World. My Nintendo DS is sucking out my life force.

I sort of feel incredibly warm and fuzzy when I look at myself now as compared to last year...

And I want a Wii. Badly.

HOLY SHIT, SNOW.

SNOW. There is snow outside, it is SNOWING.

This is AWESOME.

Natalie, Joseph and I all say...




Natalie is Cinderella from like...the 50's live action version, Joseph is a tetragramaton cleric from "Equilibrium", and I'm a person from Battle Royale.


Is this pointless? Oh hells yes, but I like drawing. Speaking of which...

TO SKIN A CAT, premiring November 8, 2006. Be there!

Sang the blues6? NO MORE.

Now it's all about citizencat13. IM ME!

I did this once before, but sort of sucked at it. People are are already my friends don't need to comment again, it's not like a "friends cut, lolz" or anything...


Massive icon upheaval...I fell off the Battle Royale wagon and am once again oddly obsessed.

That's about it. :-D

I'm bored this morning, and taking a break from yet another freaking screenplay I'm writing (more about that later) to give you an exclusive look at my desktop.

My God, this has never happened before, viewing the inner workings of Cat's subconscious? Fuck no, thanks to rex_dart I now have a freaking sweet background, and I don't know..you can laugh at my little post-its or something or laugh at the games I play :-)

Anyway, yeah.
( My desktop background...can you tell I'm bored this morning? )


Anyway, about the screenplay I'm writing, I blame getting the idea while walking by a lake, which will be the setting to said short film. I've decided that even if I'm doing other projects (like hell I'm adding the one I'm talking about now to my list!) I can still write others, just in case there's a time where I don't get stupid ideas from stupid situations.

The idea? Take the "omigosh we wore the same dress to the party" and sort of add serial killers. I swear it makes sense if you read it. All I know is that this one won't have a rooftop shootout, since there's only one gun...and no roofs.

For me, boredom breeds creativity.